Roxanne the Van
Client: Rebecca Guy-Hamilton
Build and photos by: Tyler Reinhold
In the summer of 2021, my good pal Rebecca bestowed upon me the distinct honor and pleasure of building a worthy getaway vehicle for all her trips outward into the world. In May, a blank canvas was delivered to my garage in Hopkinton and in October, two days before her trip west, this humble box of sticks rolled into Reb’s driveway. The design is simple yet harbors function. Warm and inviting, yet rugged and durable. It was a long 6 months. A fear of the little unknowns fueled procrastination. Procrastination fueled anxiety. Anxiety fueled more procrastination which fueled guilt which in turn fueled a mad dash to the finish in September that gave me some experiences I’ll hold with me deeply. Learning 12v systems and cutting holes in the roof. Trouble-shooting a sputtering water pump at 10pm while sitting in a languid pool of sawdust imbued water. Gluing up scrap ply to make table tops… All of these wonderfully insightful yet daunting tasks that for so long held me back from making progress were now just more ticks on a to-do list. Each one propelling me into the next.
And then under sagging October skies, it was gone. Off to the desert for two weeks and then onto another life. It was a strange and absurd catharsis I felt. In many ways it held the feelings that most achievements do. A warm concoction of pride and fatigue underscored by contented optimism for where we go next. But driving home with Mel, the van now merely a transaction, I felt the pangs of homesickness and a collapsing of direction. There was no longer a looming deadline or a 8 foot tall block of steel sitting in my yard reminding me of promises made. But gone also was a place where things made sense.
It’s strange where the presence of home will find itself. Beneath metal filings and sawdust, drowned in 1000s of cups of coffee I found in myself oddly becalmed in a maelstrom of uncertainty and pending tasks. Each decision and the very motion of creation felt smooth and instinctual. I felt the summers of being way too young and working for my dad building houses. I felt the calm of understanding. The van is off in the world and that profound sense of home is finding its way into someone else’s heart and that brings me joy.